It starts early in life, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
These ideas and thoughts are planted in our minds early on in our development as human beings, and as we mature and develop, they are only cemented more. Our answers may turn from astronauts, Presidents and movie stars to marine biologist, politician or TV anchor, but they are still focused on the fact that we are what we do, enforcing the idea that we have less value until we have reached the destination of our dream job/occupation.
Perhaps a better question to ask ourselves and our children would be, “Who do you want to be when you grow up?”
When we focus on the destination or the end result, we are forgetting that life has a beginning, middle and end. God didn’t create us to someday “become” who we were supposed to be – He created us the way we were supposed to be right from the start! Yes, we mature and learn new skills as we grow, but your identity is not in what you do, your title or your talents. As a child of God, your identity comes from being in your Father’s family.
I am in my late 20’s, and I remember the first time I heard the phrase “Fear of Missing Out,” or “FOMO.” I laughed at how ridiculous it looked and sounded, then in the same moment, I identified with the sentiment. If I choose to commit to one thing, I am saying no to a myriad of other missed opportunities. For a few years of my life, this fear gripped me. It affected my dating relationship which turned into my marriage, it affected my work as a missionary as well as my friendships. A desire to have deep relationships and fun turned into desperation to fit in so that I wouldn’t be left out. Choosing to dedicate myself to one ministry seemed like I was missing out on what everyone else was doing and experiencing. Accepting a marriage proposal meant reckoning with the fact that this relationship would take precedence over many others for the rest of my life. Good things? Yes. However, what’s behind all of this?
Fear.
Sometimes it’s easy to recognize fear in our life, and other times it lurks in the background causing guilt and shame. These challenging emotions cause us to wish we were in a different place, and daydream about when we might reach this “destination” in our life, when we will be fully mature and able to do anything we set our minds to – the day when we will have no faults, and we won’t have to fear making a mistake. As much as we wish it could be true, that is a false idea.
Maybe if we focused a little bit more on the journey God has us on rather than the “someday” destination, we could be more content in this moment and develop into that person we want to be faster. The truth is, we don’t have to wait until “someday” to be the person we want to be! God promises that He will lead and guide us, that His Spirit will fill us and give us wisdom – NOW!
Shake off that weight of full responsibility over becoming who you want to be and allow Jesus to walk beside you, sharing that heavy yoke. Look at today, not tomorrow. Make commitments and choose to fulfill them, realizing that doing so will bring forth character and perseverance. Choose to see the people you DO have in your life as blessings rather than being jealous of what you think other people have in relationships.
The ultimate truth is that on this earth, we journey until one day our journey ends and we reach our destination – which is Heaven. Talk to any Elder in your life and they will tell you that they haven’t stopped “becoming”, but have learned to just take one day at a time. Maybe life looks a little more like a Maps trip with 8 different stops rather than one beginning and one end. We go into uncharted territory, then backtrack into the familiar. Our path criss-crosses and reverses, speeds forward and halts to a momentary idle. Let’s keep our eyes on the prize – a lifetime with Jesus.
Journey on, my friends.
